It’s been too long since my last post, so I must apologise to all my loyal followers. I always intend to write weekly, but real life dictates unfortunately, and so you may find yourself meeting with me only every couple of months.
I feel compelled to write about my experience as a perfumer over the past year or so, and be forthright about the ‘blocks’ that can happen to those of us in creative fields. I have definitely been experiencing that for some time now. At the start, I found it frustrating, and I tried to push through it so I could get back to doing what I love, which is bringing you inspired fragrances. But those actions only compounded the problem, and so anything that I had been working on, pushing out, trying to create, fell short of the mark and just wasn’t, well, inspired.
I’m not sure exactly when, but some time over the past few months, I realised that I have been suffering from burnout, and I had an epiphany about my life and my work; I needed to let things be, and surrender to the experience.
And so, if I couldn’t bear to turn on the computer that day, I just didnt. And if I needed to sit on the couch and watch Ellen, I did (and still do!). And if getting into the studio didn’t feel right that day, I closed the door and went home. Or for a walk. Or for coffee with a friend. Or whatever my mind and body needed that day.
At first I thought the world would miss me. That One Seed would suffer for my lack or inspiration, that my customers would suffer for my lack of productivity. But none of those fears seem to have come true, and, in fact, I find myself being more real, more genuine, more ‘in the moment’, more creative in my every day life. And slowly the inspiration has started coming back. Not when I’ve penciled in a ‘day in the studio’, but at random moments, and I am finding that my ideas have been more original and more inspired than ever before.
Its a funny thing to surrender. Such a scary concept – as if surrendering means you give up and throw everything away. But I have found that surrendering actually has the opposite effect. Surrendering to me has meant finding who I really am, where my creativity actually comes from, being more me than ever before, and seeing life in a whole new light.